I lost my dog today

My little guy was a 14 year old chihuahua. Brave...oh my was he brave. And with such an adventurous spirit. He'd been healthy his entire life, but the last three saw drastic changes. Blindness. Partial hearing loss. Two tumors removed. His gait also went through a change, subtle at first. The first year saw merely a strange little step here and there. Another goes by and it's impossible to make it up and down steps. This final year, he barely left his bed. I also began to notice a subtle sort of confusion. Boo would pause at random points, his "gaze" locked onto nothing. His gait became even more unsteady. Two nights ago, he stopped eating and would not get out of his bed. When I lifted him, he was as limp as a rag doll. I thought perhaps he would go peacefully that night, but he held on. The next day I took him to the vet. 

He seemed more alert than the previous night, but on the trip to the office, I noticed how prominently his little spine stood out and how sunken in his haunches had become. His breathing also seemed more labored than usual, with a sort of rasping shudder at each intake of breath.

His adventurous spirit raised its head just a little once we reached the office, and he eagerly sniffed and explored...but had to pick himself off the floor every few steps as he stumbled and fell. The doctor said we could do an endless battery of tests. We could also try to treat the symptoms as a simple infection and try to make him as comfortable as possible, but when I asked her what she would do, she said something that really resonated with me. She asked what was the one thing I could say about Boo. About his personality and what made him…well…him. I told her that he was the bravest dog I've ever seen and loved and embraced life. Then she asked if that was still who he was. I thought about him as he is now. Jumping at every noise. Too weak to explore beyond the confines of his dog bed. Barely being able to take two steps without collapsing. Yes, he was still brave, but his little body was so ravaged and tired. Perhaps we could have treated the nausea, given him fluids to counteract the dehydration, and given him medicines to manage the pain, but the legs would never regain their mobility. He would spend the rest of his remaining days (which I did not believe would be long) confined to his bed…not seeing, not hearing. If I did that, I would be doing it out of selfishness, and because I didn’t want to let him go.

Making the decision was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I sat in that room endlessly repeating “I don’t know what to do” and crying until my voice became hoarse. I called friends. I called family. But once the choice was made, I felt…no, I KNEW it was the right one. 

They gave him the sedative, and I held him in my arms until he fell asleep. I told him I loved him. Petted and scratched all of his favorite places. Whispered how we would see each other again. Sang him the silly song I had made with his name all those years ago. The happy song I would hum and sing to him during our quiet, cuddling moments. And then I let him go…

If you can hear me, my brave little man, I want you to know I meant every word.

Dollar Tree Pitfalls

I notice that a lot of my acquaintances shop at dollar stores thinking that they're saving vast sums of money, but I'd like to caution people against making that assumption. Yes, these all-things-for-a-dollar stores seem like they can't be beat, but you've got to look at quality and quantity before making the decision to buy. At my last trip to the Dollar Tree, I made several purchases and wanted to review them here.

1 can of black olives - Cheaper than Lindsay Olives by around 60-70 cents per can, but the taste was mildly floral and the texture mushy. Waste of money.

1 jar of green olives - Cheaper than Lindsay Olives as well, but the taste was just bad. It was olive-like but really salty.  Waste of money.

1 package of pocket sized facial tissues (Minnie Mouse design) - Pretty good deal here. Kleenex has pocket sized facial tissues priced over 4.00. Their pack comes with 8 versus the Dollar tree's 6, but it still makes this a good bargain.

1 container of Dial deodorant. 1 container of Lady Speedstick deodorant. Both are roll-ons. Both work well. Both were a dollar. However, each one was 1 fl oz or more less than my Suave. Which, if I remember correctly, costs me about 1.68. Verdict: it's still a decent purchase, especially if you like those brands. However, I'll stick my Suave.

1 package of State Fair corn dogs. Two per package for one dollar. When I opened that package up, I had to give a little giggle. Inside were two of the tiniest corndogs I'd seen. Not as small as the Krystals cornpups, but not that much larger either. Verdict: Well, two of those could make up one State Fair dog. You get 5 or 6 of the regular ones per box for less than 4 dollars...so I'd say this is a pass. Plus, Publix sometimes has SF corndogs on their buy-one-get-one sales, which would drive the price down to around 2.00 per box of 5/6.

1 Tin of smoked mussels. Very tasty. No grit. The little metal tin was fully stuffed with these plump little beauties which I hate on saltines with a bit of hot sauce. Verdict: will buy every chance I get.

1 Cheese grater. Cheap as anything but it works. I had found some at thrift stores, but they all had rust on them. Yuck. And the ones in the regular stores all began at around 10.00. So I'm happy with this purchase.

Steak knives. Also super cheaply made. Small too. More like a paring knife with a serrated blade. However, it slices through meat very well, and that's all I want it to do. Verdict: happy with purchase.

For me, this experience has driven home the fact that these dollar stores do have good deals. I love to get greeting cards and party supplies there. Gift bags are an awesome deal, and sometimes you can find really good bargains on boxes and bags of name brand candy (though be sure to look at the servings size to make sure you're getting as good a deal as you think). However, I was disappointed with almost all of my grocery purchases and will be very selective in making future grocery decisions in these types of stores. Because despite saving some money here and there, I also "lost" three dollars.

Some tips for saving money

Look for sales and buy only what you will actually use. For example, it's no good stocking up on broccoli if you hate the stuff, no matter how good a deal it is. Personally, I love the Publix Buy one Get One Free sales. Even though their regular prices are higher than some of the other discount stores like Walmart, with the BOGO offer you manage to save quite a bit. A lot of it is processed foods, but if you're like me, you do a combination of fresh and processed...because with a 50+ hour week, I don't have time to play Suzie make-from-scratch Homemaker.

Some things I am always keeping an eye out for:

Canned fruit
Canned vegetables
Frozen vegetables, especially Birds Eye
Pasta
Spaghetti sauce
Bread
Cheese
Processed meats such as hotdogs, sausages, ham, and bacon

I try to limit myself to these items, but Publix does have recurring BOGO for other items such as chips, cookies, chocolates, sodas, Ritz crackers are almost always BOGO every month, and frozen entrees.

I do indulge in a few convenience meals, but only because I can stretch them out to multiple meals by adding fresh vegetables and pasta. The Margaritaville Shrimp with Cilantro Lime is great with summer squash and penne. And I just love pairing Bantry Bay mussels (either the tomato or garlic butter) with fettuccine. When you factor in the BOGO offer and adding the pasta and veggies, you're looking at 1.50 per serving.

Speaking of adding veggies, another way to save money is to cut down on meat. Meat is expensive. Let's face it...it's not all that great for us in large amounts anyway. And to all those who might seek to undercut this idea by citing the whole caveman argument, I suggest talking to your cardiologist about the 2 pounds of red meat eating habits Americans are indulging in these days and how it's affecting our health.

Which is not to say that you should eschew meat altogether. I love the stuff. However, there are plenty of tasty options to supplement (not wholly replace) meat on your grocery list. I try to have at least three meals per week that consists of no meat. Some would recoil in horror at the thought, but it's actually quite simple. Cereal and milk. Oatmeal and fruit. Pancakes. Waffles. Salad. Veggie wrap. Beans. The possibilities are endless.

My two favorite that I have almost every week: veggie spaghetti and pinto beans (not together).

Veggie spaghetti is awesome. All you do is saute some of your favorite vegetables in olive oil before adding the sauce portion. Now, my aunt makes homemade sauce. I prefer jarred. It's faster. I grew up on the stuff. Plus, homemade sauce is always too acidic for me and gives me awful reflux. My favorite mix of vegetables is diced tomatoes, yellow squash, onion, and green bell peppers.With the veggies and sauce, I have enough to mix with an entire box of thin spaghetti...which comes out to around 8-10 servings, depending on portion size. I freeze this in containers which hold around 2 portions worth and just grab one out whenever I feel like taking a portion to lunch and maybe eating the other for dinner the next day.

As for pinto beans, I love the stuff. My best friend is a hummus lover, but I'm not a fan. Too many hidden calories from the oil it's emulsified with, and I'm just not too keen on the flavor of chickpeas. Now pinto beans on the other hand...everything you can stick into hummus, you can scoop up pintos with too. Celery, crackers, pita. Plus, you can make a dish of it all by its lonesome. Can't really see myself spooning hummus over rice. The best recipe I've found has been from an online site that I can't seem to find right now, but I'll post the link as soon as I do...credit due and all that. However, it's really quite basic. Pinto beans, a cut up onion, a couple cloves of garlic, salt, water. Put into a crockpot on low for 7-8 hours. Drain off as much liquid as you'd like (depends on how thick you like it), and blend in a blender or with a stick blender. Tastes just like the restaurant stuff. Hello Homemade Bean and Cheese Burritos. Nice to see you Meatless Nachos. What big grains you have, Mr. Pintos and Rice.